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We are a welcoming community that understands the trials and pitfalls of managing a mental illness.
Find friends or seek romantic relationships knowing that everyone on this site has some form of mental illness. Boy were they expensive and when I did get a date (didn't happen a lot) things got complicated when it came to disclosing my illness.
We kept things friendly and fun rather than expecting things to turn romantic or physical right away.
By not overtly expecting sex, commitment, or even compatibility upfront, and instead focusing on just creating a series of fun, memorable experiences, we had implicitly set the precedent for a approach to dating.
The friendship-first approach centers around sharing fun and memorable experiences with the people we meet, and seeking to learn their stories and their preferences, free of any overtly sexual or romantic expectations.
Sex and romance can definitely still happen in the context of friendship-first dating, but they are never assumed or expected, and the top priority is always to understand and validate someone’s existing preferences and goals rather than imposing your own goals and expectations upon them.
The concept of being “friendzoned” on an implicit expectation of sex, because it posits friendship as a suboptimal outcome instead of being a worthy end in and of itself.
Consequently, that one person who previously would’ve been a single “yes/no” one-off date with no followup instead becomes not just a friend, but a fantastic advocate in our quest to build future friendships and relationships.
The most effective strategy for finding a good relationship is thus to optimize dating sites for finding Friends understand our needs, become invested in our story, and enthusiastically introduce us to more of their friends.
Jessica later introduced me to yet another awesome friend in San Francisco, and once again, her friend and I ended up having amazing chemistry.